The Hurried Child

Peter Pierro & Peter McGahey First shown March 26, 2022

Maturation

The maturing of children has always been a difficult issue to deal with in both education and in sports. What is the correct grade to introduce fractions to children? When is Susie mature enough to hit a golf ball? Do girls mature earlier in life than boys so boys should start their school days a half year or so older than girls?

In my work as a teacher and as a coach, I have seen many instances of the effects of maturation. Let me share one of my personal experiences in each position with you.

School Example

I was teaching a fourth grade class and the school curriculum required that we teach the children the problem with the use of “double negatives”. e. g. “I don’t have no money.” Well, the kids could not see the conflict. We tried everything we could think of. We tried taking nickels off of the desk and saying. “We don’t have no money now, so what do we have?” No responses of “I ‘got it’.” or  “Money” from the group. With a few more examples some children finally ‘got it’ but other children simply weren’t ready to ‘get it.’

A few years later, I was teaching sixth grade in a different school district and there  it was in their curriculum, “double negative". So I read from the English text, “I don’t have no money.” The group responded, “So you have some money.” “You’re not broke.”, etc.

Sports Example

I was a utility infielder with the LaSalle-Peru team in the now long-forgotten  Northern Illinois Fastball League - circa 1950. Our coach decided to give a player just out of high school a tryout - Hal was the younger brother of “Flea” Walsh, our star second baseman. Flea was even shorter than me and the best athlete I ever played with in my softball, baseball, basketball career.

Hal had great potential but he simply wasn’t ready to play at our level and he was cut from the team. I never saw him play again. He may have been able to stay and mature with us if our coach had been more patient and appreciated his potential rather than relying only on his present performance.

The Hurried Child   March 26, 2022

The child is constantly confronted with the nagging question: “What are you going to be?” Courageous would be the youngster who could look the adult squarely in the face and say, “I'm not going to be anything; I already am.” We adults would be shocked by such an insolent remark, for we have forgotten, if indeed we ever knew, that a child is an active, participating and contributing member of society from birth. Childhood isn't a time when he is molded into a human who will then live life; he is a human who is living life. No child will miss the zest and joy of living unless these are denied him by adults who convinced themselves that childhood is a period of preparation.

David Elkind, The Hurried Child

Once in a while, I’m called by a high school principal or athletic director to give a speech. I like talking to these young people. They have such eagerness and hopes for the future. They have already heard enough about the cold, cruel world awaiting them in having to work for a living, earning a college degree, becoming responsible citizens, entering the adult world, etc. In other words, up to this point they have been deficient in what they have been doing relative to what they will now be required to do.

So, I begin with this thought, “You are graduating from high school today and you will be continuing this life that you are already living. You are, and always have been, a growing person. You have spent your last four years living and growing in this place. Now you will be leaving here to continue your growth in who you are and what you do at a different place; a place with different learning and growing opportunities.”

This is also a message to the students’ parents - Your child is growing up and ready to make a transition - a change in her life - a change in your relationship with her. She is going to college - He is starting a new job - She is moving out of your house - He is giving you an in-law - She is going to be a pitcher on a softball team in the Big 12 Conference .

The world may be taking a quantum leap so work with your child (who is no longer a child).