Intro to Rudolph Dreikurs and Sports

As I stated a couple of weeks ago, I was in my first college teaching position, about 1970, when Rudolph Dreikurs’ book, Children the Challenge, entered my professional teaching career. This book has positively affected my teaching, coaching, and writing up to the present time.

While writing training materials for USA Softball in the 1980s, I created the fictional Falcons’ co-ed softball team. Although each player is a unique person, there are actions that identify the roles that are being played by each of these individuals. In the meantime, my colleague, Peter McGahey, was coaching college soccer and developing his philosophies around player-centered coaching.

In the following five (5) weeks we will be identifying and describing the following players and suggesting actions to be taken while dealing with them:

1.  Stan the Star -  Power

2. Paula the Pest - Attention

3. Bessie the Boss - Revenge

4, Harry the Hopeless - Discouraged

5. Ollie the Outsider - Community/Belonging

I. Stan the Star - Power 

Let me introduce you first to Stan the Star because he's used to being first. He is the best player on your team and if you don't believe it, just ask him. All of his former coaches have treated him in the manner that he expected to be treated -- catering to his every wish, praising him at every opportunity.  After all, Stan is the kind of player who could  make you a winning coach and take your team to the state finals. 

Somewhere along the way, Stan was convinced that he was indispen­sable. Without him, the team didn't have a chance to win. Everybody told him that in one way or another. He has agreed to the deal and he has learned how to use the power that comes along with it. He can have things be the way he would like them to be. It's easy (in the short term) to deal with him. Just give him everything he wants; let him bat clean-up, let him pitch all of the important games, let him come late to practice, etc. In the long run, however, you'll have a real problem on your hands.

A situation:

  You have told everyone to take three laps around the prac­tice field to loosen up for drills. You look over at the dugout and there's Stan checking out the bats. “Hey, Stan, get going around the field.”

  “Oh, Coach, come on. You know that I don't need to run those laps -- I'm ready to do some hitting.”

  "Everybody takes those laps. Get going.”

Stan starts out in a slow jog and you know he's going to take two laps, or maybe only one if he can get away with it.

  Stan comes in with the last group of kids who have taken three laps: he has taken two. It's confrontation time. “Stan, you only ran two laps. Get out there and take the other lap.”

“I ran three laps, Coach. You can ask those guys. I ran with them.”

How are you feeling about this?

  “I'm tired of him getting things his way all the time. He thinks he can do anything he wants, but that's not how our team is going to be run.”

  What you'd like to do:

Take him down a few notches. Show him who's boss. “Get out and run that lap or you can go home.”

Let's see what happens:

  “Just get going!” Stan gives you a dirty look and starts out very slowly and all eyes including yours follow his snail's progress around the field.

So where are we? 

Stan took center stage again. You had to conduct a power struggle in front of the whole team; you've lost practice time; the good feelings about practice have been replaced by negative feelings, and last, and most important, you have given Stan another lesson that the person with the most power wins. You had more power than he did -- this time -- and you 'won' and he 'lost.' Stan thinks, “Maybe next time. . .”

 Try this instead.

Set up your next drill or practice session and don't give Stan a place. Whenever he tries to get into line, say, “Hold it, Stan, I don't want you to be in this drill.” Ignore him as you give directions to the other players.

  Sooner or later, Stan will beat your side. “When is it my turn to be in the rundown, Coach?” (calmly) “Maybe later, Stan. The only guys I'm working with now are the ones who have run all of their laps.”

He may get the idea and start on his third lap and you have made your point in this situation and have set the tone for future encounters. Or he may say, “I ran all my laps.” You respond (calmly), “Just wait and we'll get you in when it's time.”

 Going all the way - Logical Consequences

“Coach, I'm not going to take another lap.” “That's your right. You can either take the lap or you can sit out the rest of the practice. And, if you don't practice, you don't play next game. Now, make up your mind so I can get back to working with the rest of the team.”

By doing this, you are forcing him to make the decision -- he can choose to run the lap or he can choose to sit it out. This is a lot different from saying, “You haven't run that lap, so get off the field.” For this, you would be defining the consequences.  

"The greatest gifts we can give our children are the roots of responsibility and the wings of independence." – Maria Montessori

Stan's Goal: Power