Adults and Competition

It really is a funny thing about competition - adults talk about having to compete in the “Real World” and they are very clear about when and how they, themselves, are going to compete in their real sports worlds. There are some very distinct rules and models that must be followed. Unfortunately, we adults reserve most of these rules and models for ourselves while we expect our kids to live and play by the rules and beliefs expressed in Model #1 - The Big League Model. Here it is plus a few other models that we adults have created for our experiences in the World of Sports.

Model #1 - The Big League Model

This is the model, the model most people have in mind when they talk about Competition. This is the model that is used effectively to produce professional athletes. We start children off in baseball in Little League or Bambino League, Babe Ruth League, American Legion Baseball. They play in high school, in college, in the minors and finally the best make it into the Majors. Throughout this process, those who don’t measure up are dropped out or eliminate themselves. If you’re not good enough, you’re cut from the squad. In using this model with our teams, we have to separate the players, those who belong, from the non-players, those who don’t belong. Don’t let the poor players get in the way of the progress of the good players. If they can’t cut it, they’re history.

Adults Like This Model -- Usually It’s for Someone Else, Including The Kids.

Model #2 - The Flight Model

Each year many golf and tennis clubs have championship matches. Some of them set up “flights”. The best 12 players are in the Championship Flight, the next 12 in the First Flight, the next 12 in the Second Flight, and so on until all members of the club are included and everyone is competing at a level at which he can win - everyone has the possibility of being a winner; of getting a trophy.

We Adults Like That.

Model #3 - The Handicapping Model

The team I bowl on is in a league that uses handicaps. If my team averages 750 and yours averages 780, you have to give me a “spot” or “handicap’. Usually this is 2/3 of the difference, so your team gives my team a 20 pin spot per game. This makes the competition “fairer” than would a head-to-head contest - each team has a chance to win.

We Adults Like These.

Golf, too.

I’ve played golf with some ‘competitors’ and here’s what happens on the first tee with a stranger. I suggest we have a small bet, ‘Let’s play for a buck a hole.’ (I’m a real gambler). Joe says, O.K. My handicap is 12, what’s yours?’ I reply, “I’m an 8”. I will give you a stroke on the 3rd, 6th, 11th, and 15th holes”. That settles that - everyone is pleased about the arrangement and we can tee off - the poorer player has a better chance to be the winner.

OBSERVATION - Why should I give him strokes? If he can’t measure up, that’s his problem.

Here are two other models that have positive value for us adults and some kids.

Model #4 - The Road Race Model.

There are many road races open to the public in large cities; the Boston and New York Marathons, and in small cities like the 10K race in Oglesby, Illinois. Anyone who wants can enter, so there are the stars going for #1 and your third cousin Sandy going for the fun of it. There are disabled and aged people competing. No one is eliminated; the lights are left on for the late finishers. Participants are successful or unsuccessful according to their own goals, their expectations, or their PR, Personal Record.

We Adults Like This and We Should.

Model #5 - The Special Olympics Model

The Special Olympic philosophy respects each person regardless of her disability. When you watch a Special Olympics, you see each child doing her best in whatever event she has chosen. Each contestant is acknowledged for her efforts.

Everyone's a Winner - Winning is the reward for risking and participating.

We Adults Like This and We Should.

Model#6 – The Festival Some team sport organizations set up festivals for their players. The festival environment is striving to simulate the neighborhood and community playing experiences. Players are all involved in age-appropriate games. Playing time is maximized to improve engagement time, skill development, decision making, and fun. Results and standings are not kept. Individual players are regularly rotated between ‘teams’. They will play with and alongside many other players throughout a festival. The focus is on the joy of playing, learning through the game, and being a great teammate.

We Adults can be Skeptical of this one. We Should Love it.

Doesn’t it appear that we allow adjustments among adults that we don’t allow for our children? Can’t we cut them at least as much ‘slack’ as we cut for ourselves?